Hello it's the weekend. This is The Weekender ☕

The Supreme Court released a report Thursday, a summary of its (non) findings as the Court's Marshal searched for the source of the leaked Dobbs draft opinion.

Long story short: the Marshal and her team did not manage to identify a suspect.

But one glaring question permeated the report: were the justices themselves investigated?

The Supreme Court released a statement from the Marshal early Friday evening, saying that she did interview the justices, but did not feel the need to make them sign sworn affidavits — like she did with all of the other Court employees who had access to the draft.

It's a pretty stark difference, as the sworn affidavits are the Marshal's strongest tool in obtaining true statements. And she was blunt with the repercussions, should any of those employees be found to have lied.

"Another statute, 18 U.S.C. § 1001 [False Official Statements], has become important to the investigation since all personnel who had access to the draft opinion signed sworn affidavits affirming they did not disclose the draft opinion nor know anything about who did," the report said. "If the investigators determine any of these personnel lied, they could be subject to prosecution."

So now we know that the justices weren't omitted from the investigation altogether. But it's clear that they weren't treated like the other Court employees. And that's crucial, given that there's evidence to suggest that some of the justices should have been prime suspects. A former anti-abortion leader told the New York Times last fall that he learned of the decision in Burwell v. Hobby Lobby Stores weeks ahead of time, thanks to a friend who got the news from dinner at the Alitos'.  

The report, and this statement, are products of an increasingly bizarre cult of delusional piety that surrounds this Court. Justice Clarence Thomas poses with then-Republican candidate Herschel Walker, Justices Amy Coney Barrett, Brett Kavanaugh, Neil Gorsuch and Alito get feted at the Federalist Society, but these Court loyalists insist that they're all apolitical straight shooters. Thomas' wife actively tries to overturn the 2020 election, comforted along the way by her "best friend" and husband, yet we pretend to believe that her political fanaticism does not pierce his bubble of judicial independence.  

The leak grievously offends this tribe, absolutely irate that the opinion was not handled like the divine decree it is. But presuming the justices' innocence, or at least being unwilling to aggressively investigate them, comes from the same poison well as pretending that they're just neutral umpires, calling balls and strikes.
 

More on other news below. Let's dig in.

— Kate Riga

Requiem For An Agent Of The Ukrainian State

For a long time, the Ukrainian state was seen as a Frankenstein, a lumbering Soviet inheritance that was both victim to and enabler of what had effectively become a gangster's paradise. During the years I spent there, corruption was understood to be endemic, and nowhere more so than in law enforcement and the judiciary. Anything — court decisions, police raids, investigations — could be bought with the right money and connections.

That's a big part of what made the West so pessimistic about Ukraine's chances at defending its state against a Russian onslaught in February 2022. Who would risk their life to defend that?

That conclusion — one I shared to a large extent — was shown to be entirely wrong. I wrote this week about Yevhen Enin, a Ukrainian government official who embodied why this view of Ukraine was wrong — and who perished this week in a helicopter crash outside of Kyiv.

— Josh Kovensky

Let George Santos Judge 'Drag Race,' Cowards

The best Santos revelation (so far) was revealed this past Wednesday: that he reportedly used to perform as a drag queen in Rio de Janeiro. According to Brazilian queen Eula Rochard, Santos sought her friendship as a fledgling performer because she's "highly respected in town."

"He used to hang out in my house while his mom was playing Bingo," Rochard told reporter Marisa Kabas. She also shared a photo of her and Santos dressed as his drag persona, Kitara Ravache.

Santos has since denied ever performing as Miss Ravache, but a Wiki biography for a user named "Anthony Devolder"—one of his aliases—says that he "startted his 'stage' life at age 17 as an gay night club DRAG QUEEN and with that won several GAY 'BEAUTY PAGENTS". (The spelling errors are his.)

As a Drag Race stan, I, for one, am pleased that the ultraconservative freshman congressman has a skeleton in the closet that's cool and glittery rather than gross and decrepit, like a dead dog.

And since Santos also appears to be a fan—or at least cultured enough to know who BenDeLaCreme is—I'd like to propose an idea to Santos, Congress, and RuPaul herself: Let him guest-judge "RuPaul's Drag Race."

It could work! AOC did it. Why can't he? He has more experience than she does, considering Miss Ravache's work on "Hanna Montana." Just something to think about.

— Kaila Philo

MTG Is Trying Really Hard To Seem Legit

Rep. Majorie Taylor Greene (R-GA) is trying to look like she is changing her tactical approach to politics, leaning into a seemingly new public image as the number one ally to Speaker McCarthy and other moderate Republicans. And she has been picking fights with fellow far-right allies to make her case.

This week, she picked a Twitter fight with Rep. Matt Gaetz (R-FL) after he tagged her in a message congratulating her for the committee assignments she received. In return she snapped at him for holding up the speakership vote. Greene also reportedly got into a quarrel with another prominent hardliner, Rep. Lauren Boebert (R-CO), in the ladies room just off the House floor during the first day of the speaker elections.

MTG's so-called new style and the fight picking that comes with it is likely performative. But it sure is getting her attention and leading to speculation that the famously far-right member of Congress may be trying to pull off a "remake" or "rebranding."

— Emine Yücel 

"The reports that I would let a dog die is shocking & insane. My work in animal advocacy was the labor of love & hard work. Over the past 24hr I have received pictures of dogs I helped reduce throughout the years along with supportive messages. These distractions won't stop me!" 

That's a tweet from Rep. George Santos (R-NY) — your favorite and probably the most popular for not a good reason freshman congressman, who is quickly climbing the leaderboard for the conman-of-the-century award — responding to allegations that he allegedly stole money from a fund created for a disabled veteran's dying service dog.

Santos tweeting he "helped reduce" dogs for years might be my favorite Freudian slip of all time.

Santos later deleted this tweet and tweeted again, switching the word "reduced" with "rescued," but the damage (us and all of Twitter laughing) had been done. 

— Emine Yücel 

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